The hope of the new year

As I shuffle through the countless dresses in my wardrobe to find a suitable one, to welcome the new year in, I am excited and hopeful about it approaching. The chance to start over and change the things that you don’t like. Over the Christmas and New Year period, I have witnessed couples around me get engaged and a few couples that were thought to be destined to end up that way, end. It seems that with the change of year, your relationship may change too. I was going to write about how awesome it is to be single, all the people you can kiss and flirt with, the freedom that you have to only do what you want and not be forced to be fair between you and your partners family and friends. There is no need to watch Bridget Jones’s Diary and relate to being that single person. But that seems a bit too insensitive, to my dear friends. However you find yourself tonight, be thankful that you have survived another year and smile. If that fails, get on tinder, I’m sure you are minutes away from getting 39357743 dick pics sent to you.

Thanks to everyone that has provided feedback and support since I have started writing. Don’t worry, there are plenty more stories to come and I’ll try my best to bring my A game tonight to create more πŸ˜‰

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Have you met my friend Bridie?

I am fascinated with the merging of friends. Sara and I were friends. Sara meets Logan. I meet Logan. Sara meets Logan’s friends. We all go out while they are dating. We all attend their birthdays. We are in their bridal party. We all go to Sara’s baby shower. We will now go to their kid’s birthday parties for the next few years at least. These people will be in my life and I will probably see them twice a year for at least 10 years. I didn’t choose for them to be in my life, but they kind of now are. I will hear stories about their life achievements and what they are currently up to and they will hear mine. The whole concept of the friend of the friend is intriguing to me. That is why, there is the temptation when you are single to think maybe it is a good idea to hook up with his friends. Your friend is in her element, she thinks that it can all work out in the vain hope that you will then get invited to all of the groups parties and she can then be with a girlfriend that she actually enjoys talking to. My advice is to resist the urge, because that first meeting afterwards, even if it is 3 years later is going to be extremely awkward…

It was Logan’s 30th birthday. They decided to have a party during the day and the day was gorgeous. The wine was flowing, plenty of laughs and food. I arrived early and stayed late, obviously lingered like a creep. I know the majority of Logan’s friends and there were the usual jokes about me and pretty much his only single friend hooking up. We are used to the routine and flirt to make them happy, he is funny, so it is not as terrible as it sounds. It gets later into the night and people arrive that I have not met before. He is tall, dark and semi handsome, actually he is handsome. But I have to leave and forget about this new mystery man.

The next week Sara and I were well into our shopping trip when I remember to comment on the mystery man. Sara doubles over laughing.Β “You’re kidding, right?” I look at her so confused as to why she finds it so hilarious. “No, I’m not kidding, he is just my type.” Now she returns the quizzical look to me, “You met him a couple of years ago, he was at our wedding, he tried to pick you up at my birthday??” Hmmm, I was with my ex boyfriend at the wedding, but him trying to pick me up a few years ago? “Everyone wanted to go home after our party the other year, except you and him and then he kept on asking if you wanted a lift home and you kept on saying ‘Why would I want a lift, when I have my car here?’ ” “OOhhhhhhh he was hitting on me, I didn’t know and can barely remember.” “Of course you are interested in him now though, no car, no job at the moment, just your type, because you would not want him when he wasn’t going through a hard time, Oh Bridie, there is something wrong with you.” “I think I want to see him again then if he was already keen, tell Logan.” She shook her head and then nodded in agreement.Β 

Sara continued to tease me for the next week, that I only date losers and should maybe think about dating someone who has their life in order. Logan organised that we would all go to go to the mystery man’s cricket club’s Halloween party, which would be held on Melbourne Cup Eve. We were going to the cup the next day, so the girls and I got ready for a night out, while Sara was going to be the designated driver. Lena and Maddie came over and we started on the frozen cocktails with extra alcohol in it. We were well on our way to getting wasted when Sara and Logan came to get us.

We arrived at the party, as it was a private function, 4 girls and a guy rocking up to a dress up party that weren’t dressed up, we naturally were looked at. The guys that played cricket were happy to see us, their girlfriends however, not so much. Logan introduced the mystery man ‘Macbeth’ to us, this would be the fourth time that this had happened, I think this time though we both would definitely remember. I was so nervous and was not loving the pressure that was on this meeting. He was already blind and seemed pretty funny. So I was instantly more attracted to him. I like my men to be hilarious with just a dash of unpredictability. We tied his shirt in a bow, so his mid drift was showing and while he was getting down to the phat beats of Ginuwine’s – pony. He would knock back his drink and then drop his glass, it was funny and kind of weird. Sara’s feet were hurting from the shoes that we bought last week, Lena was blind, Maddie was trying to pimp me out to the best of her ability and I was nervous, nervous and more nervous. It was time to leave, but this seemed to take a very long time. Macbeth finally asked for my number. He walked us to the door of the pub and kissed me on the cheek, to which Logan’s response was “You can do better than that.” He grabbed me and we kissed intensely, I felt like I was 12 with my friends all around me but the kiss was passionate and hopefully a sign of things to come, if he was coming to my house later that night. We left.

I don’t think that Sara was too impressed with the car ride home, as we were extremely loud and having a great time, laughing and carrying on but Logan coped the dirty looks, while we continued to be silly. Picking up some greasy McDonald’s on the way, we arrived at my house and I was extremely nervous and found it hard to relax relaxing while Lena, Maddie and Logan were having a great time until Sara was well and truly over it and they went home. Lena and Maddie continued the craziness, both so drunk and smashing the Macca’s. About half an hour later, I got a call from downstairs. I went out to meet Macbeth, we did the awkward walk through my lounge room past the giggling girls. I was so nervous, this was the closest thing to a one night stand I had ever had and I was 26. The kissing started to the soundtrack of the naughty girls in the next room. It turns out that Lena was throwing up out of my front door, and it was dripping down onto the floor below. Maddie was losing it and could not stop laughing. The bedroom theatrics went on well into the morning and the giggling from the next room turned into deep breathing from being so drunk. Macbeth slept. I struggled. I got up a few hours after going to sleep, had a shower, put new make up on and went back to bed. Apparently that was all the rest he needed and we got busy again. So far, so good. He did not wake up and freak out as to who he was sleeping next to, which was my ultimate fear. He looked quite happy to continue sleeping, Β but I was eager to get him out of there as we were all so hungover and had to get ready to go to the races. He finally got the hint and asked where the train station was. I felt terrible so I drove him home in my shitty car. I was really nervous because we had never really talked before, but he seemed like a really nice guy. This was a shame, I was pretty keen on this guy and hoped this wouldn’t be the last time I saw him. When I dropped him, he gave me a kiss and left.

I returned home to see Lena in a state that I have never seen her in. We went back to sleep for a while, to hopefully regenerate some kind of spark back into us because the day sure was going to be long and humid. We drove to Lena’s, with her head in a bucket. I do not know how she decided that she would suck it up, got ready for the races and ended up looking stunning, while dying inside. We were all ready and underwhelmed at the races and I’ve never been back. Lena lasted an hour before heading home before the race had even started. Sara and I stayed until after the race that stopped that nation and I just wanted to get home. All up, I think we stayed two hours.

I started to text Macbeth for a while and it was like a drug. I was getting limited replies which should maybe have been my indication to stop texting him. However that didn’t happen and I obviously wanted to look like a complete very keen psycho. This one sided texting lasted for four months. Okay, it was only a few texts here and there, but seriously, I should have got the hint, if he did not want to see me the next week, he did not want to see me three months later. Β Lena was out the next weekend and saw him. She was again pretty blind and got someone to call out to him. He looked at the group and kept on saying that that was not his name but it was Hamlet. This confused Lena and she text me. Macbeth was definitely his name, but this was another side to his strange persona, because Lena definitely was convinced by the end of that second encounter that his name was in fact Hamlet.

A few months later, I was on a dating website and came across him. He saw me look at his profile, so he checked out mine. I sent him a text and then realised he had blocked me from the site. Even while I write this, I cringe. I have been lucky that I haven’t run into him…yet. It is coming though, as Sara and Logan’s beautiful baby turns into a magical little girl, I’m sure I’ll remain over the other side of the party, trying not to choke on my cake, while Logan continues to embarrass me.